Chapter 47: Transitions
Wrapped in her Mate’s embrace, teetering between sleep and consciousness, Buffy felt warm. Not physical warmth, neither of them had any to give the other. No, she felt warm inside, in her heart and soul. She just felt loved. And not only by him, but by everyone for whom she cared.
Two days before, her friends and family had proved to her in the simplest and most touching way that they didn’t hold against her what she had done or said without her soul. At some point during the night or another, she had managed to speak to each of them in private, and all had given her the same response, if in different words. Whatever had happened, whatever might happen in the future, they were and still would be there for her. She only hoped she could be as good a friend to them as they were to her.
The little surprise party-wedding shower had been nice. The girls had gotten her a few funny gifts, they had watched a Kleenex movie, talked about dresses, and made plans for the week and the preparations. She had asked Dawn to be her bridesmaid – she would have asked all of them, but it would have been a bit strange since they would be the only guests. Dawnie had happily accepted, but requested, out of Anya’s earshot, that Buffy chose any color but green for her dress. Laughing, Buffy had told her she could get whatever color and style she wanted, as long as it fell within their price range. This, surprisingly, wouldn’t be as much of a problem as Buffy had first thought it would, because two unlikely sources were pitching in.
The previous afternoon, Giles had called from England and made Buffy and Spike an offer on behalf of the New Council. He had admitted it was his idea, but the whole organization was with him on this. He had apparently decided not to follow his predecessor’s example, but had decided, instead, to explain his plans, discuss them, and gain approval of the majority of Watchers whenever possible. His offer had been simple. He wanted the two vampires to formally work with the New Council in training Slayers, potential Slayers, and possibly even Watchers. Exactly what they had been doing with Manon and Chloe, except that they would help prepare more people, and, of course, would be paid for it. Handsomely. From what he had explained, he wanted the New Council to financially help the active Slayers so that they would never find themselves in a situation such as Buffy’s after her mom’s death. Accordingly, Buffy would receive compensation, too, but he was proposing for her and Spike what was basically a full time job, and at much better pay.
They had talked about it for a little while before calling Giles back and giving him their answer. First, they certainly could use the money, and it would be nice not to worry any more about Dawn’s college tuition, among other things. Second, they would be around, hopefully, for a long time, and no one could say how long the Magic Box would remain open or even profitable. Accepting the New Council’s offer was putting all financial worries behind them as long as they were careful in their investments. And finally, there was the question of the Slayers. Both Buffy and Spike, although maybe for different reasons, thought it was good to help the chosen kids to live a little longer if they could, be it by showing them how to fight, or by helping them mentally to accept what they were. In the end, the choice had not been difficult. They had, however, a condition to their acceptance. It had been Spike’s idea, but she had understood easily where it had come from.
*****
As they were about halfway through the movie, Buffy noticed Manon slipping into the kitchen, presumably to get a drink, and she followed as inconspicuously as possible. She had talked to the Witches already, and Manon was the last on her list as far as the girls were concerned. She had cornered Xander as he was coming back from dropping Giles off at his hotel, and had talked to Steven earlier in the day. The only person left, other than Manon, was Angel, and she very much dreaded that talk. And yet it would have to come, sooner or later. He was the only one that she had actually physically hurt.
“Hey, Manon. Can I talk to you for a minute?”
The kid closed the fridge from which she had pulled a soda can and observed Buffy warily for a second, before shrugging.
“Talk about what?” she asked as she leaned against the counter.
“About you patrolling with the soulless me the past few days.”
“It wasn’t patrol,” Manon remarked quietly.
Buffy nodded. “True. Whatever it was, thank you for helping. Without you I’m not sure I could have found him. But you do realize it was incredibly dangerous, right?”
One corner of Manon’s mouth lifted in a twisted smile.
“Yes, I know that spending my nights next to a soulless vampire wasn’t exactly the safest thing. Andrea was explicit about that already.”
“I’m just glad I didn’t hurt you,” Buffy added softly.
Manon gave a small nod, but her gaze had fallen to the floor and she seemed suddenly withdrawn, as she had been earlier at the shop. Buffy wasn’t sure what was wrong, but she doubted the girl was close enough to anyone else to tell them. She had been close to Andrea, but their link had seemed very tense in the afternoon, as if they had been arguing repeatedly about something.
“Is there something wrong? Something you’d like to talk about with someone?”
The girl started shaking her head, but then her eyes came back up to look at Buffy.
“I didn’t care.”
“You didn’t care about what?”
“I didn’t care that you were dangerous. I didn’t care that you could have killed me in a second. All I cared was to know that he was alright and that just meant going around with you.”
The vampire looked at the young Slayer in front of her, at loss for words. She knew quite well what it was like to be in love without having any hope of ever being with the person you loved. But that didn’t mean she knew how to console the girl. And it was even more uncomfortable because it was Spike they were talking about.
“It can’t keep on like this,” Manon added in a whisper, more for herself than for Buffy it seemed. “I’m so distracted all the time that I’m going to get myself killed. Half the time he is so nice and then he’s just mean and I just can’t stop loving him. I just wish my spell had worked.”
The last words had come out almost like a plea, and quiet tears were rolling down the girl’s cheeks. Still unable to find the words she needed to hear, Buffy came to the Slayer and gave her an awkward hug.
*****
They had accepted Giles offer, on the condition that no girl, Slayer or potential, would be forced to come to or remain in Sunnydale. Whoever would train with the vampires would do so of their own choice, would be allowed to visit their home twice a year, at the New Council’s expense, and would be able to stop their training without needing to give a reason. Giles had agreed. Buffy and Spike were now officially on the New Council’s payroll. Manon would soon be on her way to France.
The wedding being in only a few days, the vampires wouldn’t get their first paycheck in time for it. But another source of unexpected funds had revealed itself. Spike had told her that Angel had refused to take back their escape money. She had been surprised, because she had forgotten about that, and because Angel hadn’t mentioned it when she had finally had her little talk with him.
*****
Manon dried her tears, gave a weak smile to Buffy and returned to the living room without another word. The vampire remained where she was, trying to collect her thoughts. The girl was right, something had to be done before she got herself hurt. But what?
She was pondering the question when Angel came in through the back door, apparently as startled to find her there as she was to see him now. They exchanged similarly hesitant smiles, and a few seconds passed before a single word was spoken. And when they spoke, they did so at the same time.
“How is your party…”
“Angel, I’m sorry…”
They stopped talking at the same time, and started again together.
“Going fine, lots of fun.”
“You have nothing to be sorry about.”
Frowning at the ex-vampire’s words, Buffy took a couple of steps to stand in front of him and pulled on the collar of his shirt, exposing the scars she had left there.
“It does look like something to me,” she commented.
With careful moves, he did the exact same thing as she had, tugging on the edge of her blouse to reveal his mark on her skin.
“Did I ever apologize for that?” he asked quietly. “I can’t seem to remember.”
“It’s not the same,” she protested. “You were ill and…”
“And so were you,” he interrupted gently. “In a way, you were. So don’t worry about it. No harm done.”
Smiling gratefully, Buffy nodded. More than anyone, he knew what she had gone through, what she was feeling now, and his forgiveness did not surprise her.
“Steven and I will go back to LA tonight,” he announced, changing the subject. “But we’ll be back in a week. I’m glad for you two, you know.”
“Really?” she couldn’t help questioning. “Not that long ago you hated the idea of Spike and me being together.”
Slowly, he nodded, and there was an apologetic look on his face.
“I was jealous,” he admitted quietly. “It’s hard to let go of someone I’ve loved so much. Even harder to let go of the two of you at the same time. But I’m sure you’ll take good care of each other.”
Buffy acquiesced silently, once more unsure of what to say. She only hoped the best for him, and she had a slight suspicion, if she could read Cordelia and him correctly when they were together, that he would be getting it.
*****
Soft kisses pressed to the sensitive marks on her neck pulled Buffy out of her thoughts and she purred her appreciation at her Mate’s actions.
“Good morning, kitten”, he whispered just behind her ear.
“Your kitten,” she whispered back as she turned around to face him.
“Mine,” he agreed, and kissed her.
*****
It was early in the afternoon, and Spike would have felt a lot better if his Childe and him hadn’t been in a place as exposed to the sunlight as the airport was. But they had both wanted to be there to say goodbye to the kid. He knew Buffy really liked the young Slayer, she had liked her from the beginning and Manon’s actions while Buffy had been soulless had only made the fondness grow. As for him, there was something he wanted to do. Maybe it was a stupid idea, love wasn’t something that could be commanded. But maybe it would work, and if it did then the kid would certainly be happier, and maybe safer.
She seemed a bit suspicious when he took her away from her Watcher, who was going with her, and the Scoobies who had come to say goodbye. Suspicious, and curious, too. Out of sight of them all, he stopped her and cupped her face in his hands. And hesitated. He had felt it was foolish of her to try to get rid of her love with a spell. Wasn’t he as foolish now?
“So, am I getting that kiss I asked for, after all?” she asked, but her tone made clear that she didn’t believe it was the case.
Smiling gently, he fixed his gaze to hers, and let his demon come close to the surface and do its part.
“No kiss, pet,” he said quietly. “Just a wish. I’d like you to go home and forget me. Don’t look at other vamps thinking that maybe they’re like me. The only way they are like me is that they will kill a Slayer if given the chance. You need to find yourself a human. A pretty thing like you, I’m sure you’ll have no trouble at all. And you’ll be happy like all kids your age should be. Alright Manon?”
She blinked several times, and as he let go of his hold on her, she nodded.
“They’re calling your plane,” Buffy’s voice said suddenly from behind him.
Manon gave a half smile at Spike, and mumbled a thanks and goodbye before walking past him and to Buffy. The older Slayer, she hugged, and promised to stay in touch with her. Then she joined Andrea, and soon they had disappeared. Spike watched Buffy curiously, wondering whether she had heard enough to understand what he had done. She returned his gaze thoughtfully, before finally asking:
“I thought you didn’t do thrall.”
“I don’t. Except when I don’t see another solution.”
“Do you think it will work?”
“I don’t know,” he replied as he took her hand and brought it to his lips. “It should. Unless she fights it really hard.”
It was in the kid’s hands, now. He had opened a door for her, and just hoped she wouldn’t close it.
*****
As she went through her warming exercises, Chloe wasn’t really paying attention to Matt’s directives. They had been through this so often, she knew exactly what he would say and when, and could just let her thoughts wander. Which, right now, was good, because she had a lot to think about.
The Council of Watchers was now the New Council of Watchers, a name change that wasn’t really important in itself. What troubled her was that this institution, for which she had learned to have such a deep respect, was now headed by someone who wasn’t even a Watcher anymore only three days before. And it seemed to be turning everything around. Today, Manon had been sent home, and Chloe had been told that from now on she would train with the two vampires extensively every day until she had reached her maximum capabilities. These very same vampires that only a few days before she had been told she would probably have to slay. There was just something she didn’t get.
For years she had been warned about seeing vampires as anything but monsters. Buffy’s example had been told to her as a cautionary tale. A Slayer couldn’t accept the help of apparently friendly vampires, let alone have feelings for them, because they either turned bad and tried to kill her and her friends, or they got attached to her so much that they would rather turn her than let her die her normal death. Even when coming to Sunnydale, she had been instructed to be very cautious about the two resident vampires, especially Buffy since she had lost her soul, but also Spike, because he had never had one. And now, this. Train with them. Learn from them. Work beside them.
They had finally arrived, and Buffy joined her on the mat while Spike settled on the sofa, prompting her Watcher to immediately move out of his reach.
“Ready?” Buffy asked simply.
“Do I have a choice?” Chloe shot back, a little bitterly.
“Actually yes, you do,” the vampire replied with a frown. “Your Watcher didn’t explain that to you?”
Explain? Since when was a Watcher supposed to explain anything? Matt told her what to do, and she did it without wasting time with useless questions. Losing time only led to scurrying, which caused mistakes, which could be fatal.
“The Council pays us to teach you all we can so that you have the best odds to live a long life,” Buffy explained slowly, throwing a glare to Matt. “But if you do not want to train with us, you are free to say so and to return home. We can’t teach you if you don’t want to learn from us.”
Chloe gave a frown to her approaching Watcher.
“Matt? Is that true?”
A brief look of distaste crossed his features, and she knew instantly that the vampire was telling the truth.
“Technically, yes,” he admitted. “But it is more…”
“Why didn’t you tell me?” she interrupted him.
“Because I know you take your responsibilities seriously and…”
“This has nothing to do with responsibilities,” Buffy interjected. “It has to do with whether you can trust us enough to be comfortable patrolling and fighting by our sides, and sparring with us. If you don’t, you can still be a Slayer, just not in Sunnydale.”
“Is that why Manon went home?” Chloe asked. “It seemed to me like she trusted you too much.”
“Manon’s reasons are her own,” Buffy said impassively. “And so are yours. If you decide to go back to London, no one will frown on it or ask you why.”
As the blonde vampire said this, she gave a pointed look to Matt, and Chloe had the distinct impression that her Watcher would get in trouble with Rupert Giles. She considered Buffy for a moment, and then the other vampire who hadn’t moved from the sofa but was clearly listening attentively to everything that was being said. Could she trust them? They were demons, but the Watchers trusted them enough to think Slayers were safe with them. Could she believe that, which was against everything she had been taught so far? If she did manage to trust them, it would be because they would manage to prove themselves to her, and not because Watchers were telling her to. Not this time when her life was in the balance.
“I will stay here,” she announced carefully. “For now. And see whether I can learn from you or not.”
Buffy nodded, and gave her a warm smile. She seemed so different from the creature she had met just a few days ago, and who had talked about killing Manon and her as if it was nothing for her. It was really very strange. And confusing.