Chapter 3
“Ok, what was with the total spaz fest back there?”
“He was choking,” Buffy said, shrugging a little as they walked back to their dorms. She had been worried that William’s choking was all her fault since he’d caught her staring at him, but luckily the crisis was averted. “They’re nice guys.”
Cordy snorted. “That’s not really the adjective I would use to describe them.”
“Don’t be mean.” Buffy slid her key into the lock on her bedroom door and let them both inside.
“Hello? They looked like the guys who work at the video store. And I swear to God one of them had a pocket protector.” Cordy helped herself to Buffy’s bed and sat down with a sigh and then laid back and stretched her arms over her head.
“No one was wearing a pocket protector.” Buffy giggled as she set her purse down on her vanity and sat down on her plush, pink satin stool in front of it. “You shouldn’t be too quick to judge, Cordy.” With a sly grin as she pumped out some lotion into her hand, she said, “It’s the nerdy ones who make the most money.”
Cordy perked right up to that, as Buffy knew she would. “Oh my God, Buffy! I’ve been going at this dating thing all wrong! Bill Gates? Total nerd! And totally rich!”
“See? Now you’ve got your priorities in order.” Buffy shook her head ashamedly at her friend’s materialism.
“You know, that one guy with the choking was kinda cute,” Cordy said thoughtfully as she stared at the ceiling.
Buffy’s hand stilled on her leg, mid-swipe, before she continued rubbing lotion on her skin once more. “Yeah, he is.”
“For a nerd.”
Buffy rolled her eyes.
“Hey, where’s your roommate anyway?” Cordy rose from the bed and walked to the closet on the other side of the room to inspect the missing roommate’s wardrobe. “Oh God, the pastels!”
“Amanda has Psych 101 now. She won’t be back for a while. Don’t look at her stuff!”
Cordelia pulled out a plaid wool pencil skirt and a white top with ruffles on the cuffs and collar and she made an expression of disgust. “This is atrocious! How can you even look at that girl when she wears this 1990s schoolmarm crap?”
“I can do it because I’m not shallow and disgusted by everything that doesn’t meet your standards of perfection,” she said teasingly, turning around to look at her reflection in the mirror as she pulled her hair up in a ponytail.
“You’re such a saint,” Cordelia said sarcastically, shoving the clothing back in the closet. “So I guess I’ll just go find William and screw his brains out.”
Buffy’s eyes widened and she turned around abruptly to face her. “What?”
“Aha! I knew it!” Cordy pointed her finger victoriously at her friend. “You have a crush on him!”
Buffy blinked in embarrassment and turned back around when Cordy folded her arms and stalked towards her with that self-righteous grin of hers. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
“Buffy, Buffy, Buffy.” She sighed with her hand on her chest and sat on the edge of the vanity. “Parker was an asshole. But that doesn’t mean you have to slum it with the underlings because your heart was broken.”
Buffy balked. “I’m not…slumming it. I barely know the guy.”
“Mmhm,” Cordy said as she inspected her nails. “That’s why you saved his life. Because you barely know him.”
“Anyone would have done the same thing! He was choking!”
“No, not anyone. Just you. You’re the only one who got up to help him.”
“Well,” she said, pausing a bit under her scrutiny, “that just speaks poorly for mankind. He could have died.”
Cordy stood up and smiled at her friend. “You certainly gave him something to jerk off to later.”
“Ew! Why did you have to say that?”
“Because it’s true! He’s probably doing it right now.”
“God, Cordy, you don’t have to be so…graphic.”
Cordelia rolled her eyes. “You didn’t see his face when he realized you saved him. You’re probably the only girl who has ever touched him.”
Buffy was quiet for a moment, silently beaming at the thought that William might actually think of her in that way, but that was impossible. She wasn’t his type, couldn’t be his type. He probably liked the arty girls with glasses or the intellectuals who all had those severe bob haircuts and wore cigarette pants. And yet, she couldn’t help but ask her, “What did his face look like?”
Cordy’s mouth twisted to hide her grin. “He had this sort of deer in headlights look, like someone had given him LSD and showed him Jesus.”
“You’re such a liar,” Buffy said, giggling as she continued fixing her hair and makeup. She was going to the video store later to rent some chick flicks for her evening of pathetic mourning and there was a chance Parker would be there so she didn’t want to look dumpy. Parker was always renting documentaries and independent films to watch and dissect and talk about with her. But he wouldn’t be doing that any longer, would he? Suddenly, Buffy felt very sad and her chin trembled. All the tears she’d been holding back that day wanted to break free and she sniffled once before she broke down.
“Oh God,” Cordy said quietly, awkwardly patting Buffy on the shoulder. “It’s ok, Buffy! I’m sure William thinks you’re a total babe.”
Buffy looked up angrily through her tears. “Not William. Parker!” Her voice squeaked as she cried again.
Cordy sighed in relief. “Right. Parker. Because that makes sense for this kind of reaction. You know,” she said comfortingly, rubbing Buffy’s back to soothe her, “guys like Parker don’t deserve girls like you. You’re lucky it ended as quickly as it did.”
“Really?” Buffy sniffled pathetically.
“Have I ever lied to you? He’s a creep. I bet he didn’t even go down on you.”
Buffy’s face turned red and she hid her face, but then she thought about it. And suddenly she was very angry. “Hey, yeah! He didn’t!”
“See? Asshole.” Cordy stood up, confident that she knew everything about everything and had successfully steered her friend clear from sulking.
“Come to think of it,” Buffy said with a scowl as she wiped her nose with a tissue, “Adam didn’t either!”
“And you blew him!”
“And I blew—yeah! What a bunch of assholes!” Buffy stood up, her eyebrows lowering as she glared angrily, thinking of all the guys she’d dated in her past who treated her like trash.
“See? You were about to cry over that prick and he didn’t even know how to treat a lady.”
“Well, fuck him!” Buffy said, flipping her ponytail over her shoulder. “I’m going to rent a romance and I’m not going to cry while watching!”
“Slow down,” Cordy said mockingly as she followed Buffy out of the room. “Don’t go crazy with the healing.”
“Shut up.”
“Besides, you have a new boyfriend who wears pleated Dockers.”
“I hate you.” She locked the door behind them as they exited, smiling to herself. Cordy could be prissy and bratty and a little judgmental, but she sure knew the right things to say to cheer Buffy up. And behind that snobby exterior was a really good friend who would never admit that she liked Battlestar Galactica. She claimed she only watched it for the rare occasion that Jamie Bamber and Tahmoh Penikett took their shirts off, but Buffy knew the real reason. Cordy had a thing for Sci-fi. She’d murder Buffy if she ever told anyone, though.
* * *
Buffy was dressed in white latex from her throat to her stiletto boots, save a slit that ran from her clavicle to her breasts to show off her cleavage. Her blonde hair was twisted in braided buns on either side of her ears and her nipples were hard, straining to be seen through the thick fabric of her cat suit. William lay on his back, creatures holding his limbs down as the evil lord prepared to freeze him in carbonite. But she was there, lurking in the shadows, waiting for the right time to save him from Jabba’s lair.
“Let me out!” he said, but the creatures snarled and laughed evilly as they held him down. His muscles rippled beneath his white shirt as he strained to break free but one look from the princess calmed his nerves. She would come to him.
They poured the carbon substance over his body and he wailed in pain before darkness fell. The next thing he remembered was her face, her hands roaming over his cheeks and his lungs struggling to work again. She’d saved him and now she was straddling his waist and biting her lip.
“I feel terrible,” he said.
“I love you,” she said breathily, squeezing her tits together.
“I know.” And then he kissed her, letting his hands roam over her body which was magically naked beneath his caress. Lucky, considering how difficult it is to remove latex. “Looked like you could use a good kiss.”
She was panting and glassy-eyed from his talented lips and she opened her mouth to speak, pausing for a moment when he held her hand in his. “Stop that.”
“Stop what? What are you afraid of?” He nuzzled her neck with his lips.
“Afraid?”
“You’re trembling.”
“I’m not trembling.”
He flipped them over, changing their positions and settled between her legs. He smirked down at her confidently. He noticed when she gaped at his muscular chest. “Don’t get excited, sister. You like me because I’m a scoundrel. There aren’t enough scoundrels in your life.”
“I happen to like nice men.”
“I’m a nice man.”
“No you’re not, you’re—” He cut her off with a kiss.
“Oh, Christ,” William shouted as he suddenly came, speeding up the movement of his hand on his cock. His body slumped in his desk chair in relief and he closed his eyes once more, smiling at his latest fantasy. That one served to help him come twice in the last hour. Buffy was a thing of inspiration, a muse. And she’d touched him, saved his life and smiled at him. If he died right then, he would die a happy, happy nerd.
* * *
Buffy wasn’t sure what movie to rent. All the romance movies that were available she’d seen already and wasn’t really in the mood for that any longer. But she had to rent something! She didn’t have class until noon the next day which gave her ample time for a marathon. Amanda had a study group that night and wouldn’t be home until very late. It was the perfect opportunity for movies.
But nothing was popping out at her. She walked over to the new releases, chewing on her lip as she read over the titles. That’s when she heard someone clearing their throat behind her. She turned around and smiled warmly at the video store employee, recognizing Wesley immediately.
“Oh, hey, Wesley! I didn’t know you worked here. I’m here practically every night.”
He smiled, blushing slightly that she remembered his name and said, “Well, there’s the reason. I normally work in the mornings but Stephen called in sick tonight.”
They stood in awkward silence for a moment. Wesley put his hands in his pockets and Buffy looked around the store uncomfortably. Wesley cleared his throat again, remembering why he’d come over to her in the first place. “C-can I help you find anything?”
“Oh, um…I don’t know.” She turned slightly towards the videos once more, tilting her head slightly. “I’ve seen a lot of these already. I’ve got hours to kill, you know? Maybe something epic.”
He beamed, extended his hand towards an aisle she’d yet to wander down and said, “Would you indulge me?”
She smiled prettily and nodded, figuring there was no harm in trying something new. “Lead the way.”
He practically ran towards the section he had in mind, smiling excitedly in anticipation to expose her to a genre she probably had no knowledge of. Girls like Buffy rarely ever ventured to this realm. He picked up a DVD and hid it behind his back.
“A long time ago, in a galaxy far, far—”
“I have heard of Star Wars, you know.”
“Right.” He set the DVD down. “That’s good. But have you seen it?”
“Only a hundred times,” she said, rolling her eyes. “My brother was obsessed with it.”
“You didn’t like the start of the holy trilogy?” His eyes were wide and disbelieving, and if she waited any longer to answer, he might have started to cry.
“I mean, it’s good.” She shrugged. “But Empire was way better.”
Now, Wesley knew that William liked this girl. That he’d staked his claim on her and was already obsessing over every attribute about her. But Wes was still a man and she might as well have taken her shirt off just then. Her words had the same affect on his libido. He swallowed.
“Y-yes, Episode Five is a classic.”
“And you have the new versions,” she said, looking over the covers. “I kind of like the original better. All the new special effects make it look dumb.”
Seriously, seriously unfair, Wesley thought. It was as if she were speaking directly to his heart. William owed him. “Do you like sci-fi movies?”
“I mean, they’re ok. I don’t like, seek them out. But they’re decent. I’ll pretty much watch anything, though.”
He nodded, his hand twitching, begging him to reach for Planet of the Apes to test the waters but she was suddenly wide-eyed in fear, board-stiff and breathing shallowly.
“Buffy? What’s wrong?”
“Stand in front of me!” she whispered loudly, grabbing his arm and tugging him where she wanted him, crouching slightly to hide.
Wesley looked over his shoulder, frowning, unsure why she didn’t want to be seen.
“Don’t look!” she said in a panic. “Just stand perfectly still.” She peeked over his shoulder and then squealed, crouching abruptly and clutching his arms. “Oh God, he’s coming over here!”
Wesley didn’t really mind being used as a shield and having her up against him but he couldn’t stand there all night. “Who? Buffy, what is going on?”
“Buffy? Is that you?”
She closed her eyes at the sound of his voice and she stepped away from Wesley.
“Parker.”
Wesley looked the man over who had put her in a state of anxiety. Perfect hair, dark eyes, broad shoulders, thin frame, designer jeans. No real contest there. He scratched his temple and took a step back with a tight smile, suddenly wishing he were especially witty or clever.
“What are you doing here?” Parker asked, glancing at Wesley for a minute.
“Like you care.” She barreled past him, bumping against his shoulder on the way, leaving the two men alone in the aisle.
“You know her?” Parker asked Wesley.
“Not very well, but yes, we are acquainted.” Parker didn’t seem to be listening, though, because he’d turned around and followed after Buffy. Wesley, having finished restocking the shelves twenty minutes ago and therefore hadn’t much to do, followed him at a safe distance.
“Buffy, wait.”
“Leave me alone!” she shrugged him off when Parker put his hand on her shoulder.
“Don’t be that way,” he said, smiling a bit in amusement. “I thought you were more mature than that.”
Wesley narrowed his eyes, quickly ducking them when Parker saw that he was watching and pretended to straighten the display that stood next to him.
Buffy’s mouth dropped open. “Mature? You used me! You manipulated me! You made me feel bad—” She realized that she was shouting and she lowered her voice. “You made me feel bad for you that your father died so I’d sleep with you! How low can you possibly get?”
Parker rolled his eyes. “I should have known what a waste of time you’d be.”
Buffy wasn’t going to cry. He was a douche bag and an asshole and he’d proven just what a piece of crap he was. But her chin was trembling and she suddenly couldn’t come up with anything to say and he was walking away, proud and sure of himself. That’s when Wesley appeared out of nowhere, blocking his path.
“Apologize,” he said sternly.
Parker actually stopped, cocked his head to the side incredulously and said, “Excuse me?”
“I said, apologize to the lady.” He folded his arms over his chest and lifted his chin. It was all very heroic in his mind but Parker didn’t seem to be intimidated in the slightest. He snorted and pushed him out of his way, almost knocking Wesley into the register counter by the double doors.
“What an asshole!” he said as the automatic doors slid closed behind Parker. He turned around to find Buffy, spotting her with her head down, her hair hiding her face. He clicked his tongue against the roof of his mouth in sympathy. He walked over to her, realizing that she’d started to cry and an idea suddenly struck him. A wonderful idea, an idea that he could wrangle all sorts of payment out of his dear friend if it worked.
“Buffy, are you all right?”
She lifted her sad eyes to his and she nodded, sniffling and smiling to hide that she’d been crying but failed miserably. “Yeah. I’m ok. Thanks for sticking up for me.”
He smiled softly. “Would I be wrong if I assumed that you didn’t have any plans this evening?”
She chuckled sardonically and wiped beneath her eyes. “No, you’d be spot on. I was just going to watch movies and sulk.”
“Well, I’m off work in ten minutes.” That was a complete lie. He had to work until eight that evening, another reason that William seriously owed him for what he was about to do. “I’m sure you have much more interesting friends than William and me, but we’d be delighted to have your company this evening.”
She raised an eyebrow and took a step towards him. “What are you two doing?”
He smiled delightedly and raised a pointed finger in the air. “Hold that thought. I’ll be right back.” Before she could respond, he ran to the back room and called one of his fellow workmates to cover his shift. Once that was handled, he called William.
“Hello?”
“William! Clean your dorm room and put on a nice shirt.”
He chuckled. “What are you on about?”
“Buffy. Is coming. To your dorm in twenty minutes! Now don’t waste time thanking me and make sure you aren’t wearing tightie whities.”
William started to panic. “What? Why? When? What is…Buffy?”
“Do calm down. I’ll be there to supervise so you don’t make a complete ninny of yourself! She is teary-eyed and vulnerable and she likes Empire so don’t screw up your last chance!”
“I’m not taking advantage of her while she’s upset!” He was already taking off his clothes and rummaging through his closet.
“William.” Wesley took a deep breath. “You are my best friend and I adore you, but you’re a nerd and an idiot and we nerds and idiots stick together. At the rate you’re going, she’ll be old and grey before you ever make a move. Sometimes hunters take maimed prey as well! There is no shame in that! Leap for it, son! Carpe diem!”
“All right, all right! I’m hanging up now.”
Wesley smiled as he clicked his cell phone shut and walked back out to the sales floor. He couldn’t believe she actually waited for him.
“Just had to phone William and make sure he didn’t have other plans. He’s so busy these days.”
Buffy smiled a little and followed him outside. “So, what are we doing?”
“Have you ever played Dungeons and Dragons?”