Chapter 4
Buffy stood nervously outside the factory, trying to compose herself before she knocked on the large, garage-type door. She was about to pour her heart out and storming inside probably wouldn’t set the appropriate tone. She’d never been so nervous before, not even when she and Angel first started dating.
It had probably taken two hours just to decide on what to wear. She settled on a white sundress with cute little embroidered flowers on the straps and the empire waistband and refrained from wearing panties. Just in case. She wasn’t holding her breath, not when he was waiting on Drusilla, if she hadn’t arrived already. That seemed unlikely since the sun was shining bright in the late morning. She hadn’t slept a wink the night before, going over what she wanted to say, over and over again until it was perfect, and then she decided to start baking.
But she didn’t know how to bake and she didn’t know if Spike would like cookies so she settled on something else, something that wouldn’t make too much noise and wake up her mother.
There was no turning back now. She had everything at the ready and the door to the factory was staring her in the face. She raised her hand and knocked and her stomach rumbled with nerves. She heard a rustling noise from inside, then a louder, glass-shattering noise, a frustrated curse, and then a thud against the door.
Spike shouted to her from inside the factory. “Who is it? You know what bloody time it is?”
Oh, his voice was like angels singing! “It’s Buffy. May I please come in?”
There was a silence that lasted for what seemed like hours as she awaited his reply.
“You here to stake me?”
“No! Truce, remember? I just want to…I just want to talk. Can I come in, please?”
There was another long silence. “All right,” he said with a groan. “I’ll unlock this door but wait a tick for me to clear out of the way so I don’t go up in flames, right?”
“Ok,” she said with a beaming smile, excited that she was going to see the love of her life and she smoothed her hand through her hair and over her dress to make sure everything was in place. She listened to the tell-tale sign of him unlocking the door and waited as he instructed before she leaned down and lifted the door up, quickly moving inside and sliding it shut behind her.
It was pitch black in the factory and she blinked repeatedly to let her eyes adjust but she was suddenly pressed against the wall with an angry vampire staring her down and oh, sweet Jesus, he wasn’t wearing a shirt. She whimpered, her toes curling in her shoe as she lifted one leg slightly, aching to rub it against him.
“What are you doing here, Slayer?” he said roughly, pressing his body against her to keep her pinned to the wall. She might have called truce, but he wasn’t the trusting sort.
His mouth was inches from hers, his lips tempting her with their bitable softness and she started panting. Then she licked her lips and said breathily, “I…I needed to…needed to talk to you.” Her free hand, the one not holding the item she’d made for him, slowly came up to rest on his hip. She had to touch him. It was a bold move, especially when he’d never love her back, but she would take that one small gift.
Spike tilted his head and studied her carefully. He was sure this was some sort of a trap which is why he’d gained the upper hand first thing. If she was looking for a fight, he wasn’t going to let her take control. But something was off about her. He dared a glance downwards and saw her holding a large Tupperware bin, the top wrapped in cellophane.
“What you got there?”
“Oh,” she said with a nervous giggle. “Um, I uh…I made you something.” She wiggled a bit making room to show him and he took a cautious step backward, but kept one hand against the wall by her head in case she bolted. She blinked coyly and held up the container for him to see, chewing on her lip for a moment before she said, “I-it’s Jell-o.” She pulled off the cellophane to show him the treats she’d made. “See? In little bat shapes. A-and it’s cherry because…well, it’s red. Like blood. I didn’t take you for a cookie kind of vamp and I shouldn’t even try to make cookies so…I figured, there’s always room for Jell-o, right?” She looked at him expectantly.
Spike remained silent, his eyebrows meeting in the middle as he tried to figure out what the hell was going on. “You…came all the way over here at eleven in the morning to give me Jell-o.”
She looked at the ground to hide her shame. “You don’t like Jell-o. God, I’m such an idiot.” She tried to move away from the wall but Spike pushed her back against it, holding her still with a firm grip to her arms. He was just staring at her, though, and it was making her feel uncomfortable and trapped beneath his scrutinizing gaze.
“What game are you playin’, Slayer?” He was beyond irritated now. First, she wakes him up from his sleep, which he really needed since he’d spent the night cleaning up the mess in the factory. Now she was pulling this? It was just weird, even for her.
“I’m not playing a game.” And then she was crying. God, she didn’t want to cry but there they were: big, fat tears streaming down her cheeks. “I just wanted to…bring you…a gift…and I know it was stupid but I…I wanted to do something nice for you…and maybe,” she hiccupped, “we could talk.”
She was sniffling and heaving and Spike could do nothing but stare at her in shock. She was really letting it rip, too. Now see, this was the sort of opportunity he previously would have been waiting for. The slayer all vulnerable and weepy, giving him a prime opening to lunge for her throat and rip it to pieces. However, he was too curious about what she was on about to do that just then.
She looked up at him with her sad, green eyes. Her nose was red, her lips were swollen and trembling, the lower half jutting out in an incredibly irresistible pout and he swallowed, suddenly affected by the sight of her. He always hated it when women cried, and he cursed inwardly for being such a wanker. He shouldn’t care that she was crying. He should be dancing in her blood! But…she made him a pressie. Thought about him and everything. No one had made him a present in a long time, if ever.
“Ok, it’s all right,” he found himself saying softly, watched his own hand raise up to wipe the tears away from her cheeks. She looked up at him through her lashes, still frowning and sniffling. Then her eyelids fluttered and she made this sweet little cooing noise as she nuzzled into his hand and Spike remembered who the hell he was. He abruptly stepped away from her, his mouth agape as he looked at her incredulously. “Something is wrong with you.”
“No,” she shook her head sadly and set the Jell-o down on the floor. “Nothing but a broken heart.” She wrapped her arms around her waist defensively and looked at the ground. “I can’t do anything right.”
Assuming she was speaking of Angel, which didn’t quite explain the Jell-o but it was the only thing that made a lick of sense to Spike at the moment, he said, “I suppose there’s going to be a period of awkward tension after you sent him to Hell and all. But he’s a git, Slayer. No use crying over that rot.” Why he was consoling her, he had no idea, but he figured he needed to say something, if nothing else but to get her out of his hair.
“Why does everyone think I’m talking about Angel? I don’t care about him!” She seemed pissed off now and Spike didn’t know if he should be grateful that she’d stopped the weeping fits or scared for his own un-life. She stalked towards him with a determined look in her eyes and he put his hands up in front of him.
“Slayer, think about what you’re doing.” He backed up a bit, knowing she’d follow him. He was making his way further into the factory where he’d have the advantage. He knew the area better than she did, and if he could get her inside far enough, he’d be safe from her throwing him through one of the blacked-out windows and into the sunshine.
She was seconds away from jumping him when she came here and now she was practically oozing with want for him. “I have thought about it. I’ve thought about it so much it makes my knees tremble.” She ran her hands up the sides of her hips as she stalked after him. He looked so tasty wearing only his jeans, his hair all messy from sleep. God, what she would do for five minutes alone with that body of his. She raked her eyes over his form seductively, slowly following him as he continued to back up.
Suddenly Spike caught a whiff of something in the air and the scent of it made him stop dead in his tracks. He studied Buffy carefully, noticed how she was rubbing her hands up and down her body, how she looked at him as if he were dinner and he almost laughed proudly. Buffy wanted him. Well, well. This certainly changed things. “You didn’t come here to bring me Jell-o, did you?”
She giggled deliciously, turned on even more by the smirk he was giving her and she said, “Maybe. Maybe not.”
This was perfect. Killing a slayer when she was begging for him was sort of sweet, wasn’t it? She was disgusting for even thinking it, because the thought of— “Oh, shit!” he shouted when he unexpectedly landed on his back as a very amorous slayer tackled him. He struggled to break free but she held his wrists above his head and trapped his lower half by straddling him.
“Mm, Spike,” she said huskily and ground her hips against him.
Well, it wasn’t really his fault if he got hard from that.
“I’ve wanted you for so long.” She whimpered and Spike couldn’t restrain the moan that tore from his throat when she started nibbling on his jugular. “Mm, you like that, don’t you?”
“Slayer, I’m not…stop it!” He rocked and bucked beneath her, trying to get her off of him, but she was much stronger and giggled with every move he made. Fuck, that was not helping his erection. He loved Dru! Dru, Dru, Dru, the woman who would more than likely be there that evening to shower him with love! He attempted one more time to get her off of him and this time he was successful, flinging her onto her back. He quickly got to his feet, taking unneeded breaths as he stared at her.
“What the hell has gotten into you?”
“I’m sorry!” she shouted angrily. “God, I’m sorry, ok! I’m sorry I’m not good enough for anyone in my life.” Her chin trembled but she refused to cry. She’d made an idiot of herself but she wanted him so badly that it was impossible to control her reaction to his nearness. He really should put a shirt on.
Her hair was wild, tousled loose around her face, her eyes glimmering with desire and her cheeks were stained red, chest heaving…fuck, had he not realized how incredibly sexy she was until then? Yeah, he’d wanted her, but he figured it for passing fancy in the hours he spent by himself when Dru would disappear to God knows where. Granted, Dru was gone more than she was around lately, but he had his reasons for his obsessive thoughts. He was a predator. It was just good tactics to know your prey inside and out and if his mind wandered off to more inappropriate things, it wasn’t his fault. He was a vampire without a soul, you know. But knowing that she wanted him, too? Well, he didn’t know what to make of that.
She was talking to him, though, and he hadn’t caught the last part. “What?”
“I said that I’m not good enough for anyone. I don’t know what I’m doing wrong but all I know is that I love you Spike and I’m sorry.”
“Hold it. Stop right there. You what?”
She smiled sweetly at him, almost shyly, and she took a step towards him. “I said I’m in love with you. Don’t you get it you big silly vampire?” Her hands were on his chest and she was looking up at him like an angel, so innocent and bright and lovely and saying words to him he’d never heard, ever. Not once had anyone said that to him and for a moment, he almost believed her.
“You l-love me?” His eyebrows were straining to meet his hairline as he stared down at her in disbelief. Her hands were like flames on his skin, heating him up as they softly roamed over him, caressing him so reverently he almost swooned.
“Yes. I think I always have been but I was afraid of admitting how much I love you, need you.” She pressed her body against his and laid her cheek against his chest. “I know you don’t feel the same, Spike, but I had to tell you just once. Just once, I had to say how much I love you before…” she trailed off and sniffled, burying her face in his chest.
He couldn’t believe any of this and he didn’t know how to break it to her that he didn’t quite feel the same way. Of course, she was beautiful, he could admit, and had a nice little body that he wouldn’t mind doing nasty things to now that he thought about it, but love? No. He only loved Dru. Would only love her. But the slayer was weeping again and he didn’t know how much more of this he could take. With a deep sigh, he pulled away from her, unsure of the feeling that charged through him at the loss of her heat.
“Look, I’m flattered. Really, I am. But—”
“Don’t say it!” she shouted with a hand in the air. “Don’t say you don’t love me. I couldn’t bear it! I know you love Drusilla. Just…let me pretend, my sweet Spike?”
Ok, what was up with the vernacular? Something was definitely off. And then it finally hit him and he snorted, shaking his head that he’d been so stupid. “It’s the spell, Buffy! Willow must’ve gotten it wrong. You’re not in love with me, you just think you are.”
She blinked with a hurt expression and threw her arms around his waist. “No! No, it’s not true, Spike! I love you! I love you with every cell in my body!”
He sighed, not even trying to pry her off of him. “Really? If you loved me so much, explain why you were hell-bent on staking me at your house last night?”
She thought about it for a moment and looked up at him with a smile. “I heard you talking about Drusilla with my mom and I got jealous.”
“So you were going to kill me because of that?”
“I just wanted to play a bit,” she said shyly, trailing one fingernail down his pectoral muscle. “Don’t you like fighting with me?”
“’Course I do! It’s bloody amazing fighting you. You’re the most…”
Spike took a step back and ran his hands through his hair. This was bloody insane, all of it. Maybe the spell had affected him, too.
“It’s the spell. It has to be. No way you’d be in love with me, no bloody way!”
“Spike, it’s not a spell.” She grabbed his left hand. “If it is a spell, explain this.” She lifted her dress and put his hand between her legs, gasping at the feel of his cool skin, his rough hands moving over her heated mound.
Spike’s eyes flew open and his voice caught in his throat, his hand froze at the feel of the slayer’s pussy. She was absolutely soaking wet. “Guh…Sl…”
Her eyelids lowered and she bit her lower lip in mirth. “That’s not magic, is it?”
He shook his head dumbly and couldn’t resist sliding his fingers between her folds one time, his eyes locked with hers in what was quite possibly the weirdest and yet the most thrilling moment of his life. She was practically burning him with her heat and the scent of her want for him bombarded his senses, making him dizzy with lust. If she wasn’t careful…fuck, if he wasn’t…
“That feels so good,” she whispered, her body gently rubbing against his and she lightly bit his shoulder and moaned as he continued to rub her.
“I don’t…” He panted, struggling to say that he couldn’t love her, that he couldn’t do this because…why couldn’t he again?
“Shhh…oh God, your hands!”
He closed his eyes, cursing his blasted cock for growing to maximum capacity, using all his strength to try and calm down. But she was so sweet, and soft, and warm, and her neck felt amazing against his lips as he dragged them along the length of it towards her face. She was moaning and biting his shoulder because she wanted him. This was disgusting! An abomination! It went against everything in his nature. Christ, if that didn’t make it all the more luscious. “Fuck it.”
He kissed her, taking her by surprise and she wrapped her arms around his neck, gasping and moaning into the wet cavern of his mouth. He kissed her like death was lurking around the corner, like the world might stop spinning if he didn’t devour her lips with his teeth and tongue and she couldn’t help but silently rejoice that he seemed to be as desperate for more as she was. If she loved him before this, she hadn’t the words to describe what she felt for him now. Not when she was exalted to another level of bliss as he breathed and sucked and kissed her, not when his fingers deftly rubbed her slick folds with deliberate and firm strokes, teasing her entrance with a promise of what she might feel next.
She knew she went without panties for a reason.