Chapter 17: Hangovers
“Mmm,” Buffy sighed contentedly, coiling her body further around Spike’s. Semi-consciously, she brushed a gentle kiss over the strong muscles of his chest before hunkering back down for a lazy morning.
Spike stirred lightly at her actions as well, looping one arm around her waist as he turned to face her and.
“Wait a minute!”
The exclamations were made almost simultaneously, accompanied by twin pairs of round, startled eyes.
“How on-?”
“Bloody-!”
With comical synchronicity, they both noticed that the other was naked at the same time, then both glanced down at their own bodies before scrambling desperately for the sheets. After much chaos and a bit of childish sheet tugging, they were both covered well enough to risk looking at the other again.
Buffy gulped, face still flushed from seeing Spike Junior long, hard, and fully erect. “Um.don’t take this the wrong way,” she began, staring studiously at the headboard just to the right of Spike’s head, “but I don’t remember a thing that happened last night.”
“Good,” Spike let out a sigh of relief, his own eyes boring intently into the sheets between them, “‘s not just me, then.”
Buffy frowned. “What do you mean?” she whimpered illogically. “I was really that unmemorable?”
“You just said I was!” Spike shot back defensively, cheeks tinged slightly pink in embarrassment.
Buffy ventured to look at him at that, and the sight of Spike, of all people, with the sheet pulled up around his chin like a blushing virgin, face flushed with mortification, and eyes studiously avoiding her body at all costs, sent a little chortle of laughter from her lips. She hastily brought her hand to her mouth, trying to cover it up, but it was too late.
He shot her an offended look and clutched the sheet to himself more tightly.
Unable to deny the complete ridiculousness of their behavior any longer, Buffy burst into all-out hysterical laughter. “You don’t,” giggle, “have to,” snort, “look so.hee-hee.scandalized,” she shot out amidst her mirth.
Spike opened his mouth to protest when suddenly the humor of the situation struck him as well. Unbidden, a chuckle escaped his throat, and half in horror he felt himself slowly began to crack up until he and Buffy were both overcome with irrepressible laughter, still naked in bed together with defensive sheets wrapped around their bodies tightly.
“It’s not like,” Spike pointed out, trying desperately to speak amidst his own laughter now, “we’ve never,” snicker, “seen it all before.”
Buffy nodded and banged her fist on the bed with newfound amusement. “You should’ve seen yourself!” she countered. “You were all, like: ‘Augh! My bloody honor!'” She did an absolutely horrible imitation of his accent.
“Me?!” he retorted in disbelief. “You got this ‘Ew, boy cooties!’ expression on your face! What are you, Slayer, six?”
She managed to scowl amidst her laughter and batted him playfully in the arm, before chortling anew. “You know what’s even funnier?” she asked, thighs shifting experimentally under the sheet.
“What?” he asked curiously, stifling his own convulsions.
“I don’t think we even had sex,” Buffy countered. One hand slipped under the covers to check. She found herself practically dripping with eagerness from sleeping in Spike’s arms all night, but she still found the woeful tightness of one who hasn’t had a lover for far too long. “Nope,” she shook her head with a giddy little giggle.
“Then what the bloody hell ‘re we doin’ in bed together?” he demanded, sniggering still as his head fell back down onto the pillow and he let the sheet slip back down his chest.
“I have no clue,” Buffy agreed, quieting her own mirth and taking up a parallel position beside him. She frowned slightly and dug her thumbs into her temples. “What happened last night?” she groaned.
“There was that ball,” Spike had no difficulty placing down the earlier events of the evening. “We were dancin’. Did we get drunk?”
Buffy frowned. “I only had half a glass of champagne,” she concluded.
He gave her a pointed look.
“No, that’s not enough to get me drunk!” she shot back defensively.
“Really,” he retorted sarcastically, “’cause I seem to recall someone gettin’ loopy off my whisky and runnin’ around town drunk until she barfed all over my boots.”
“You gave me, like, three bottles that night!” she defended herself. “And it was you who suggested that we go to that bar. And it is so not my fault that you drive that motorcycle so fast.”
“Oh yeah, sure,” he rolled his eyes heavenwards, “‘s all Spike’s fault, as usual.”
A shy smile lit up her face at that. They hadn’t been this easygoing with each other since before that fateful day when they first tore down that abandoned house. It was nice to see him referring to their past lives together, joking and snarking with the best of them, that amused little dimpled smile on his face. His sparkling blue eyes met hers for an instant, and she realized that this was him – this was the Spike who had stolen her heart all those years ago.
“So, on a more serious note,” he cut through her dreamy speculations, “what ‘xactly did happen last night?”
Buffy sighed and tried to remember. “Well, we were dancing,” she began, “.and then the chandelier fell!”
“That’s right,” Spike’s own excitement began to pick up at this revelation. “There was a stampede.”
“.’cause the Haunting did the blood covering the walls act again,” Buffy finished. “And then Rick.”
Spike’s eyes instantly flashed with anger. “Kayeri,” he remembered with a hiss. “After my Bit. We were goin’ after him.” He instantly began looking around for his pants as the vitality of their mission hit him once more.
“Spike,” Buffy cut off his search with a small hand curved around one of his well-muscled biceps.
He stilled at the touch, hardly able to believe how good it felt. Desire flooded through his veins anew, and he desperately fought it back to try to make out what she was saying.
“It’s morning.” She gestured over to the open curtains which, fortunately, weren’t causing Spike to be burned to dust since the clouds that had accompanied last night’s storm were still shadowing the world in a dark gray. The faint light of morning could definitely be seen through the cloud-cover, however. “We slept through the whole night. Whatever hunt was on last night.” she trailed off apologetically.
He sighed and slumped back down onto the bed. “‘s all over now,” he agreed wearily. “So how’d we end up snoozin’ the night away in each other’s arms, then?”
“We came back to get weapons,” Buffy remembered slowly.
“The tranquilizers,” Spike nodded.
“And then.” Buffy trailed off.
“You fell asleep,” he recalled, pointing at her accusingly.
“I did?” Buffy was drawing a complete mental blank.
“I-I tried to wake you, and then.”
“You took our clothes off?” she asked in suspicious disbelief.
He gave her an offended look. “I bloody well did not!” he exclaimed in outrage.
“Then how did we.?” She gestured back and forth to where they were both still covered by the sheets.
He frowned. “Don’t know,” he agreed. “I couldn’t wake you, and then.I fell asleep, too. Tried to fight it, but.”
“The Haunting?” Buffy inquired.
He nodded.
They both looked to where their clothes had been scattered about the room.
“You don’t think.?” Buffy began hesitantly.
“Either that, or someone thought it’d be a right funny practical joke to pull on us,” Spike countered.
She frowned. “It wasn’t funny.”
His scarred eyebrow cocked in her direction.
Another unwitting giggle escaped her lips. “Okay, so it was kinda funny,” she admitted sheepishly.
“Great,” Spike sighed, “so our spook’s got a sense of humor. What do we do now?”
Buffy let out a little sigh of her own, looked over to where the man she desired lay naked beside her, and felt the wetness pool between her thighs with renewed urgency. “Well.” she began hesitantly, leaning in over him.
* * *
A black BMW swerved around the last departing ambulance to come to a screeching halt in the snow-filled parking lot outside the Cascade Mountain Lodge. Fortunately, the nearly constant arrival and departure of the emergency vehicles that evening had kept the lot largely clear of last night’s blizzard.
The door opened, and a figure of medium height stepped out, feet easily tracking through the snow in the well-worn Sorrel boots she sported for just such a winter emergency. One eyebrow raised at the ambulance whose lights and sirens were just now vanishing off into the distance, she headed for the inn itself.
The sight that met her as she rounded the corner of the grand log building had her eyebrows raised even further. A man in a camouflage army jacket, blue jeans, and combat boots stood out in the middle of a snowy field, yanking at a thick rope he’d attached to a nearby tree. As she watched, the man pulled hard on the rope and from the other end, which had previously seemed to be buried in the snow, a hand emerged.
She approached the man, watching with curious disinterest as a female D’vorak Demon, of all things, suddenly materialized from the hole in the ground, wearing a black evening dress and high-heeled boots.
“Excuse me?” she asked politely of the man, who now sat back against the tree huffing for breath.
Tucker cast the buxom blond in front of him a disbelieving look. “Who the hell are you?” he demanded. He couldn’t help himself from appraising her, however, and finding himself slightly flustered at the beauty before him.
“You could help me, perhaps?” she requested hopefully. “I am looking for a Dawn and Spike Summers?”
Tucker let out a weary sigh. “Dawn was kidnapped by a Kayeri Demon ’round midnight,” he provided. “They’re out lost in the woods somewhere. Spike vanished into thin air a few hours before that. The Slayer vanished with him. Whether that means he’s more or less likely to be alive.” He shrugged.
Siggy let out a resigned sigh and rolled her eyes, perfectly used to this sort of odd circumstance. “I knew I should have never let the two of them leave home alone,” she decided.
* * *
With a breathless gasp, Dawn opened her eyes to find that they were on solid ground once more. Shakily, she slipped free of Rick’s arms and promptly decided that ricocheting off of tree trunks at lightning speed was not the mode of transportation for her.
“You are all right?” Rick asked hesitantly, the steadying hand at her waist lingering a bit longer than was absolutely necessary.
Dawn nodded and composed herself, turning toward the lodge. “Well, at least you weren’t lying about the fact that that’s a hell of a lot faster,” she commented with a wry smile.
Rick ventured a nervous smile as well and took his place beside her as the walked up to the glass doors of the recreation room. “I cannot imagine where the others went,” he commented, holding the door open for her.
And he was instantly met by the click of a gun barrel.
“Um.a little help?” he said nervously, staring intently at where the end of Tucker’s spare rifle was just inches from his face.
Dawn brushed aside the weapon with a roll of her eyes. “He’s on our side,” she informed a very suspicious Tucker.
“What?!” Tucker exclaimed in complete disbelief.
“See, I told you that she would return home when she got tired of being kidnapped,” Siggy said reasonably, snacking on a bag of pretzels.
“Siggy!” Dawn exclaimed in delight, catching the other woman up in a hug.
“What’s a ‘Siggy’?” Tucker asked, puzzled.
“That is,” Rick replied matter-of-factly. “But someone who is not me stole the book for her to read.”
“Uh.what happened to your eyes?” Lena inquired of him, also confused.
“And who am I s’posed to shoot?” Tucker wondered, gun still half pointed at Rick.
“You’re in early!” Dawn pointed out in obvious delight.
“You are crushing the pretzels,” Siggy informed her, dangling the snack food up before her before taking another handful.
“His eyes are red ’cause he’s a Kayeri,” Tucker informed Lena.
“Will you stop pointing that gun at me?” Rick pleaded.
“Rrricardo’s a demon?” Lena asked in surprise.
“Where’d you get those?” Dawn eyed the familiar pretzel bag suspiciously.
“I’m only half Kayeri!” Rick insisted.
“The lady at the front desk kindly gave me the key to your room,” Siggy informed Dawn.
“No wonder I was so attracted to him.” Lena pondered.
“Spike is sooo going to kill you for stealing his junk food,” Dawn told Siggy.
“If we can ever find him, that is,” Tucker pointed out.
“So, what kind of demon did you say you were?” Lena asked flirtatiously.
“Spike can kill me all he wants,” Siggy brushed off the threat with an unconcerned wave of her hand, “after that drive, I was hungry.”
“I’m only half demon!” Rick repeated pleadingly.
“Shut. Up!” Tucker’s rifle went off, shooting out the open window and into the woods.
Everyone froze in their scattered conversations.
“Now,” Tucker began, feeling his blood begin to boil, “am I s’posed to shoot him or what?”
“No, of course not,” Dawn shook her head, slightly baffled as to how Tucker could be at all confused. “Rick’s our ally in defeating the Haunting.”
Tucker blinked. “And when did this happen?” he demanded.
“After he kidnapped me,” Dawn replied matter-of-factly. “Now, what was this about Spike still being missing?”
Siggy tisked her lightly. “Cannot even keep track of one vampire,” she teased.
“Well, he was supposed to help out with the hunt last night,” Dawn countered. “I was too busy to keep tabs on him.”
“This is what you get for chasing your allies around in the forest all night,” Siggy countered.
“I would like to second that,” Rick agreed.
“It is no matter, though,” Siggy teased Dawn. “I shall free you from another of your cucumbers.”
” ‘Pickles’,” Dawn corrected, following Siggy down the hall. “And what about the others? Have we lost them, too?”
Lena rolled her eyes. “Xel decided to try to scare the Haunting away with his snoring,” she retorted.
“Veronica probably went to bed, too, then,” Dawn decided. “And Buffy was with Spike.”
“So, does that mean that I can go to sleep, too?” Lena demanded in a whiny voice. “Because after last night.”
“Go ahead,” Dawn assured her, scowling at where Siggy had just unlocked the door to their room. “I can’t believe Ms. Danvers just gave you the key,” she shook her head.
“No one ever suspects blondes,” Siggy said simply. She gave Rick a grateful smile when he held the door open for them, and the three of them vanished inside.
“Wait a minute.” Tucker, still flummoxed, stood in the direct center of the hallway. “Why amn’t I s’posed to shoot Rick just ’cause he kidnapped you?” he demanded of the closed door. “And where were you all night? And what the hell is a ‘Siggy’?!” he exclaimed in despair.
The closed door held no answers for the poor, confused man.
“They’re tryin’ to drive me crazy,” Tucker decided with a shake of his head. “Make me completely lose my mind.” he continued to grumble under his breath. “That’s it, I’m goin’ to bed.” He trudged off in the direction of his own room, leaving the mystery behind.
* * *
“God,” Dawn sighed wearily, rubbing at the knot in her shoulder as she entered the common room of her and Spike’s suite, “where on earth could Spike have possibly gotten to?”
Siggy merely shook her head. “You were up all night, so I will blame this on how tired you are rather than as a reflection upon your deductive capabilities.” She opened the door to Spike’s room.
“Eek!” Dawn squealed at the sight of her sister and Spike naked in bed together. She quickly covered up her eyes.
“Eek!” Buffy made the exact same sound and halted her attempt to kiss the far-too-tempting vampire. She clutched the sheet up around her chest with renewed fervor at their sudden audience.
“Bugger!” Spike exclaimed, fastening the sheet tightly around his waist as well.
“Good morning, short, pale, and not entirely unattractive,” Siggy teased, apparently not put off by the situation in the slightest. “And you, I gather, are the Buffy I have heard so much about?”
Buffy cast a dark look in Spike’s direction. “Who’s she?” she demanded.
“Siggy.” Spike moaned, burying his face in his hands. “‘m never gonna hear the end of this, am I?” he inquired.
“Never,” Siggy assured him with a bright smile.
“That’s Siggy?!” Buffy demanded incredulously, taking in the blonde’s model build and ample chest. Green-eyed jealousy began to burn deep in her veins.
“What on earth are you doing?” Dawn demanded, venturing to peek out from between her fingers. Seeing all inappropriate body parts were safely covered up, she put herself full into her enraged rant. “The rest of us are out there freezing our asses off and getting attacked while the two of you are in here having a slumber party?!” she demanded.
Buffy gulped and suddenly felt like a horny, delinquent teenager that had just been busted by mom and dad. “It wasn’t us!” she insisted. “It was the Haunting.”
“Uh-huh.” It was physically impossible to sound more incredulous than Dawn did at that moment. “The Haunting made you go to bed together?”
“It did,” Spike agreed, the same embarrassment taking over him that had Buffy. “Put us both to sleep while we were gettin’ the tranquilizers.”
“And did the Haunting remove your clothes as well?” Siggy added with an amused snicker.
Two vigorous nods.
“Uh-huh.” Dawn’s eyebrows had practically shot to her hairline now. “Are you sure you want to stick with that?” she inquired. “You don’t want to change it to, say, ‘We accidentally tripped and landed on the bed, and our clothes just happened to fall off in the process’?”
Spike’s eyes narrowed. “Oi!” he complained. “Now I know you’re teasin’ us.”
“We really are telling the truth,” Buffy insisted.
Dawn frowned. “So, our local malevolent, non-corporeal entity decided to give up its evil ways and play matchmaker with the two of you last night?” she demanded.
“Exactly,” Buffy declared.
Behind her, Spike nodded vigorously.
Dawn let out a weary sigh. “I’m going to bed,” she decided. “Maybe when I wake up, this will all make an ounce of sense.”
Siggy yawned as well. “An excellent suggestion.” She cast an amused smile at Buffy and Spike. “If you have no further use of your bed,” she riddled Spike lightly, “perhaps I could borrow it for this afternoon?”
“Uh.right.” Spike’s face was definitely tinged pink by now. He frowned when he noticed Rick trying to look inconspicuous at the back of the watching pack, though. “Oi, Kayeri,” he pointed out.
“I’ll explain later,” Dawn said, sounding completely exhausted. “Now, can the two of you get dressed so that we can all go to sleep and the disaster that was last night will finally be over?”
And, guiltily, Buffy and Spike scrambled for their clothes.