Chapter 8: January 2017
Nike didn’t have to try to appear upset; she had thought they had dealt with this problem already. Davey had been doing so much better in school, and now he was failing social studies and falling dangerously close to it in reading and math. He’d never been quite the student that Will was, but this was unlike him.
Still, she hated to see the disappointment on his face that bordered on betrayal. “It’s not fair!” Davey exclaimed. “I got invited over to Chris’s ages ago!”
“I’m sorry, Davey,” Nika said, glad she could keep her voice even. “You know the rules. You won’t be going out with friends until your grades are back up where they ought to be.”
Davey’s lower lip trembled a little. “It’s not fair,” he repeated. “Mrs. Howard hates me!”
Nika bit back a sigh. “I doubt that’s true, Davey. Now be honest. Have you not been doing your homework?”
“I’ve done it all,” Davey said, his eyes welling up. “She just doesn’t like me. Honest, Mum. I’ve been trying!”
“Your father and I know that you’re capable of doing better,” Nika replied. “Until you’re working up to your potential—”
“Uncle Spike knows,” Davey said rebelliously. “He understands that a guy can’t spend all his time with books.”
Nika raised an eyebrow. “I happen to know that your Uncle Spike got top marks in school. That’s hardly a reason for you not to do your best.”
“It’s because you love Will better ‘n me,” Davey shouted. “You love him best because he does everything right! I’m not him!”
He dashed off before Nika could make any reply to that, and she put her head in her hands. What she wouldn’t give to have Wesley with her, but he wouldn’t be back for days yet. Even if he wasn’t quite as close to Davey, at least he would have been moral support.
A thin arm snaked around her shoulders. “Are you alright, Mum?”
Nika made a sound that was half a laugh and half a sigh, looking into blue eyes that were so close to Wesley’s. “I’m fine, Will.” She hesitated. Usually they never asked the boys to tattle on each other. It was unfair, but in this situation Nika wanted to know what was going on. “Will, Davey keeps saying that the teacher hates him. Is that true?”
Will chewed on his bottom lip, troubled. He knew that Davey was trying to tough things out, but it hurt to see his brother so upset. They didn’t have the same friends, and their personalities were night and day, but they were still close. “It’s not all Davey’s fault,” he said quietly.
Nika frowned. “What’s been going on, cariad ?”
“I heard Mrs. Howard say that Davey should be on Ritalin, and she’s angry that he isn’t,” Will explained. “She cuts him down in front of the class and makes him stay in at recess.”
“How long has this been going on?”
“Since school started almost,” Will admitted. “Davey said not to say anything, maybe because he kind of started it. We were talking in Welsh, and she got angry with us, and he back talked.”
Nika sighed. It wasn’t right for a teacher to hold a grudge against a little boy. Davey was active, but no more so than any other boy his age. At the school’s urging, they had gotten him evaluated, but there was no sign of hyperactivity. When he wanted to, Davey could concentrate for just as long as his twin. Wesley had flatly refused to either medicate him or punish him for his high activity level. “The boy should be allowed to be a child,” he had insisted.
Nika happened to agree, but she also thought that Wesley was deeply afraid of breaking his son’s spirit, and he refused to risk it. They had talked about finding a different school, but it looked as though the time for talking was over.
“What would you think about going to a different school?” Nika asked. “Not that you will, mind you.”
Will hesitated, and then he asked, “Would Davey be going with me?”
“Absolutely,” Nika replied. She knew that most schools had a policy of splitting siblings, but they hadn’t liked that idea. Davey and Will were good for each other. Davey made sure Will didn’t get picked on, and Will often settled Davey down.
“That’s okay then,” Will replied decisively. “I don’t want to get split up from him.”
Nika hugged her son. “I know you don’t, sweetheart. Now, why don’t you go do your homework, and see if your brother will do his?”
He gave her a quick grin, stopping to give Hannah a hug as he left the kitchen. The Slayer had come in on the tail-end of the conversation, and she returned his embrace with affection. Will had been more than a bit stand-offish when the girl had come to stay with them, but something had changed things. One day he’d been reserved, the next they were best of friends.
Nika had decided that she didn’t need to know why.
“How are you?” Hannah asked, giving Nika a quick hug in turn. “It sounds like you were dealing with World War Three in here.”
“You’re not far off,” Nika said ruefully. “You saw Davey’s report card. I had to inform him he wouldn’t be going to Chris’s birthday party this weekend.”
Hannah winced, knowing how much the boy had been looking forward to it. “If that’s what it takes to get his attention, I guess.”
“Except that Will tells me his teacher has some sort of grudge against him,” Nika replied. “If that’s the case…”
“Are you thinking about that private school?” she asked. “It might be better for both of them. I mean, Will’s not doing all that great in public schools.”
“I know,” Nika sighed. “Wesley and I have discussed it, and we both had thought things might get better, but that’s not the case. We don’t want to teach them to run from their problems.”
“Except sometimes retreating is the only thing you can do,” Hannah pointed out. “If Davey gets too discouraged, he’ll just stop trying, and that won’t do anybody any good.”
Nika gave her foster daughter a grateful look. “That’s a good point, cariad . When did you get so wise?”
She shrugged. “Somewhere along the way, I suppose.”
Changing the subject, Nika said, “That Sam seems like a very nice boy.”
“He is,” Hannah replied, her tone troubled.
“That’s a problem?”
“He wants me to go out with him.” Her voice was so low that Nika had to lean forward to catch her words.
Nika frowned. “Do you not like him?”
“No, I—I think I do, it’s just, what am I going to tell him?” Hannah asked. “I mean, what happens when he finds out what I am? If he freaks—”
Nika pulled Hannah into an embrace. “Oh, sweetheart. I’m sorry this has to be so difficult.”
“What if he hates me when he finds out?”
“I highly doubt that will happen,” Nika responded. “You’ll just have to wait for the right moment, I suppose.”
Hannah shook her head, troubled. She wished her Watcher was present. Wesley would be able to help her either decide to tell her secret or be able to advise her how to keep it. “How does a Slayer date?” she asked finally.
“Why don’t you ask Buffy?” Nika asked with an encouraging smile. “She might be able to give you some pointers.”
Hannah frowned, but then nodded. “Maybe. I’ll give her a call tonight. It might help her take her mind off Spike being gone.”
~~~~~
The house felt terribly empty without him. The silence seemed to echo. It got better when Meg came home, since the girl seemed to need the reassurance of her mother’s presence. Still, it wasn’t the same.
Buffy actually managed to cook dinner for the both of them without burning it. “Good dinner, Mom,” Meg said, trying for cheerful. She almost managed it.
“Thanks, sweetie,” Buffy replied, leaning across the table to run a hand down her daughter’s hair. “How are you?”
Meg hesitated and then admitted, “I really miss Dad.”
“I know, Meg. Me too.” The Slayer smiled bravely at her daughter. “I’m sure he’ll be just fine, though.”
“He was going really far away,” Meg pointed out softly. “What if something happens? What if he doesn’t come back?” She still remembered the last trip her parents had made together. Spike had been stuck in bed for a few days recovering. She had hated seeing her father like that.
Buffy took a deep breath. “He promised. Your father always keeps his promises.”
“I know that,” Meg said impatiently. “But what if he just can’t this time?”
It was Buffy’s greatest fear too. “Then we’ll keep going for him. That’s what he would want.” She took a deep breath. “Let’s get this mess cleaned up. Hannah’s going to be here soon.”
They cleaned up the kitchen in silence, and Buffy wondered if she should have said something else. Had she dismissed Meg’s fears too quickly? She had a tendency to do that, just as Spike usually shot straight from the hip. In a situation like this, Spike would have known exactly what to say to soothe.
Buffy wondered if she wasn’t still using him, this time for running interference between her and those she loved best. She asked him to translate for her, to explain what she meant, to be gentle when she couldn’t help being harsh.
They were yin and yang, and Buffy needed him now.
“I’m scared too.”
The words were spoken into the silence of the kitchen, and Meg looked up at her mother gratefully. “But he’ll come back.”
“Of course he’ll come back,” Buffy said, a nostalgic smile lighting up her face. “He always does.”
~~~~~
Hannah and Nika had decided that the younger Slayer ought to invite herself over for the night. The next day was Saturday, so she didn’t have to worry about school, and she could keep Buffy company. Nika knew all about having an empty house.
“So what’s this I hear about a boy?” Buffy teased gently. Their relationship had become much easier over the last couple years.
Hannah shrugged. “His name is Sam. He’s nice.”
“And he wants to ask you out?”
“He’s been following me for a while,” Hannah admitted.
Buffy’s eyes widened. “He’s been stalking you?”
“No!” Hannah quickly replied. “Sam’s harmless. He just follows me sometimes and asks if I need him to carry my books, that sort of thing.”
Buffy raised an eyebrow. “Carry your books?”
“I’m pretty sure that was supposed to be funny, but it’s hard to tell with Sam.” Hannah looked away. “I like him, Buffy, but I’m the Slayer.”
Hannah was the Slayer, and Sam was a regular guy, although Buffy was fairly certain that they could be grateful for that. After all, boyfriends were enough trouble; throw in being undead and you have a recipe for disaster.
Unless the vampire in question was Spike, and then all bets were off.
Buffy understood what she was saying without any other explanation. “How do you think he’ll feel about the super strength?”
“I think he’ll think it’s pretty cool,” Hannah admitted. “Sam already knows I’m a little different since I stopped a couple jocks from shoving him in a locker.”
“You have to play it by ear,” Buffy said eventually, once she’d considered what Hannah was saying. “I’ve had human boyfriends in the past, and it doesn’t always work out. If he’s not okay with your strength, then you know he’s not the right guy for you.”
Hannah looked up to meet Buffy’s eyes. “I like being the Slayer. It’s probably the best thing that’s ever happened to me, and it brought me to Wesley and Nika. Sometimes, though, it just sucks.”
“Yeah, it really does,” Buffy replied, a depth of feeling in her tone of voice alone.
“Will it ever get easier?”
Buffy pondered Hannah’s question—unwilling to lie, and yet unwilling to tell the whole truth. “Maybe,” she finally decided. “It doesn’t always get better. Sometimes it has to get worse first.”
“Gee, that’s comforting,” Hannah said wryly.
“Not really,” Buffy agreed, realizing that she was letting her own mood set the tone for their conversation. “Sometimes people surprise you, sweetie. Maybe that’s what Sam will do for you.”
Hannah looked uncertain. “I think he’s going to ask me to prom.”
“Are you going to go?”
“I don’t know,” Hannah replied. “I mean, it’s kind of silly, isn’t it?”
Buffy knew that tone of voice all too well. It was the “I’m not going to be able to go, so I’ll convince myself it wasn’t worth it anyway” tone. She remembered her senior prom, and while it hadn’t been the prom every girl dreams of, it had ended up okay. Hannah, however, deserved to have a dream prom with the pretty dress and the hair and everything else that went along with it.
She decided to appoint herself the one in charge of ensuring Hannah’s happy day. “It’s not silly,” Buffy said firmly. “It’s supposed to be a magical night.”
Hannah didn’t have magical nights. She had nights when she dusted half a dozen vamps. “Buffy, that’s not—I mean, I don’t even know if he’s going to ask me.”
“He’ll ask,” Buffy said with a smile. “How could he not? And then we’ll just have to make sure it’s the best night yet.”
Hannah smiled at that. She knew Buffy’s resolve-face, which meant come hell or high water, she would have the best prom ever. For the first time, Hannah thought it might just work out.
~~~~~
Wesley alternated between pacing and sitting outside the cave. It hadn’t been nearly as hard to find as they’d feared, nor had it taken them long to get there. He almost wished they’d had more time, and as he waited, apprehension filled him.
Spike had gone in alone, since that was the way it worked, but how would he know if the vampire had survived? He had no idea how long the trials would take, only that there was more than one of them. What was he going to tell Buffy if Spike never came out?
What would he do?
Wesley didn’t have a problem with Spike’s choice. When the vampire had come to him months before, the Watcher had understood exactly where he was coming from. In truth, he didn’t see another option. Even if Willow had done the glamour to throw off the outside observers, Spike would still be forced to watch everyone he loved age and die. It wasn’t fair in the least to ask that of him.
Now, however, standing outside the cave, waiting for the outcome, Wesley wondered if he had been right to support Spike’s decision. Perhaps he should have encouraged the vampire to wait until they found something less risky. Perhaps there would have been another solution that gave them the same outcome.
Wesley didn’t want to lose him.
He knew that there was a good chance that if Spike did walk out of that cave he would be human, which meant having a soul. He also knew that Angel had spent almost a century half-crazy with guilt after he’d received his soul. The differences between Angel and Angelus were stark; Wesley had experienced that for himself.
If Spike came out drastically changed, if he wasn’t Spike anymore, Wesley had already determined that it didn’t matter. He owed the vampire everything he had. Whatever was to come, Wesley would be there. He would take care of him.
A sound came from inside the cave, and Wesley turned to face the entrance and the emerging figure. It was finished.